A6: Feedback

2 May 201920 May 2019 ~ Sarah-Jane Field ~ 2 Comments

Here is feedback plus some questions and answers about the newspaper element which I asked Andrea via email for as I need to send to print very soon. (With time left to reorder if I need to).

My comments in Orange

Field

Main Body of Feedback:

Feedback on assignment

Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Quality of Outcome, Demonstration of Creativity

At this stage of the course I have made all my comments in this section – assignment 6 has no coursework and is as such a development of work from assignment 4/5.

On the blog in the post ‘Reworking Things’ – where you have written about the distraction of the Life source material – I was reminded of the creative writing maxim of murdering your darlings – this blog post explains it well:

https://www.publicationcoach.com/why-you-must-murder-your-darlings/

Part of the development of work is the letting go of elements and realising that they don’t fit the bigger picture. A useful reminder.

With regard to submitting work that is not yet finished – this is exactly how Level 3 will work. There is often a point of not knowing where work is going, but that you also need to let go. I went to see some work recently (performance-based but a hybrid of many disciplines) and that project had been ten years in the making. As I move through the degree, it becomes more and more apparent to me that the rich, interesting and complex work I’m drawn to often takes a very long time to materialise, and sometimes it feels that much of what I’m working on now is a bit like seed-planting.

I watched this version as the final version of the film:

https://vimeo.com/329118792

The work on part one has benefited greatly. The transition from heartbeat to music works with the imagery flickering. Part two on this version seemed to have no sound – is that right? There is sound but it very subtle – bits of audio-‘junk’ that interrupt the silence. I too was attached to the typewriter (see your comment below) and perhaps it is something to re-introduce or otherwise, I may need to bring more atmosphere noise in plus a few more snippets of audio-junk. There is indeed a section of absolute silence too – the absence of anything is a kind of key thing I was exploring. If I listen to the film on my noisy Mac I don’t get this but when I listen to it on my phone the subtle soundtrack of vignette 2 is noticeable. Something to look at before submission perhaps, if there is time. I was quite attached to the typewriter/voiceover from previous versions. The repeated sections of audio in Part Three work with the repetition of similar imagery combined together.

With regard to comments about the work being experiential. It is for me, work that is immersive. Bill Viola, as we have discussed before is a key example. Watching this through again I am reminded of The Family of Man exhibition curated by Steichen – although I have never seen the exhibition, the stills from it make me think that this was a curation in a similar immersive format with the common themes of humanity throughout. Within your work there are cultural references that we can read and understand in their singular parts but it is the whole piece with juxtaposition of sound/speech that creates a meaning that is may feel intangible at first to the viewer.

In a similar vein I am reminded of Danny Boyle’s Opening Ceremony of the 2012 Olympic Games as a seemingly eclectic series of tableaux – something again that was an experience to view.

Having review the work for assignment 2 and 3, these reworks are justified. The essay you have worked hard to reduce the words and focus the topic. There is a much larger piece of work should you wish to expand it back out. I think this essay explores on-going concerns of mine which link to the AV pieces so yes, in one way or another I will keep working on these themes.

Email feedback re newspaper:

My questions and comments to Andrea were:

1. It was initially conceived to support the module but as its evolved I think it supports the two films I made. How do you feel about the other work in it? i.e. the typology, invention of childhood, the final image which I might swap.

2. It has none of my written thoughts included just relevant quotes. However, I plan to send it with a separate statement but I’m confused by its dual purpose – an assessment aid / a piece of work in its own right that contains my overall themes and concepts. What do you think of that plan? I think, write the statement aimed at its second purpose.

3. I will make it very clear the films are the main thing, not the newspaper

Andrea answered immediately pretty much, due to time constraints, for which I was grateful:

1. For me, it works as an expressive piece to sit alongside but not duplicate the films. The final image is there is a problem with is in the coloured block for me – but realise that you need that graphically to work for the fragments of images. Is that the back page? If so you could just continue the front page round a wrap?

2. No written work by you is ok. I see this very much as a separate but associated piece of work. It is not an explanation of the work or meant to document the process of a project. It is not uncommon in degree shows for there to be a final piece(s) and then a book or pamphlet that is not the same as the work on the walls (or projected).

3. Agree entirely! There is a good precedent for newsprint at the moment. Giles Duley I know has done at least one newspaper for his Legacy of War project – realise this is photojournalism so the newsprint suits the genre. Also Chris Killip has a limited edition of newsprint ‘books’ of projects.

A5 Feedback

27 Feb 201920 May 2019 ~ Sarah-Jane Field ~ Leave a comment

PDF Field DI&C A5 Feedback

Main body:

Feedback on assignment

Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Quality of Outcome, Demonstration of Creativity

We discussed the realisation of the work into three videos. The use of the reversing of the audio and how this works.

My comment from the creative working was ‘Don’t Tell, Show’ – which echoed Wendy’s comment in your previous course regarding thinking about your work.

This comment has stayed with me the most out of yesterday’s chat and I have been really thinking a lot about it since. As we discussed and you have mentioned here, I am still at a stage of work-in-progress with this project. The main issue for me is how much I attempt to cram into one assignment (which is always a hurdle for me). I have identified several film titles along with its content, which function as source material for my re-imagined ‘mash-up’ as well as the book, and in particular, a film called Dialogue with Life. Knowing what needs to be part of this project and what can be left to slip away is proving tricky for me. Do I put the book to one side for now – leave that alone – perhaps the early experimental photographs I took of my hands and the book are as far as I need to go with it. Was its presence in my working journey enough to prompt some of the decisions I made in the film? Do I leave it to come back to later? All questions buzzing around my head at the moment. I also said in an earlier blog I can’t work out of the film I’ve made is a work in itself – and the book and Dialogue for Life screenshots something separate, and that I would be likely to switch between two positions several times before knowing the answer. This continues to be the case. Your comment ‘Don’t Tell, Show’ has shifted me towards thinking the book/text is probably something separate. I intend to go back to the film and make it even more about the early and final frames than it already is – I’m slightly entranced by those dancing figures but they are too literal for the work, so how I deal with that is something for me to consider before submitting. As for the frames – I am very keen to play with ways of showing them alongside the film, (perhaps without the text I have identified as so relevant to now – and which operates as a metaphor). Then I think, drop the text, but the one thing I’m aware of is how I keep returning to text across my work, how text and images interact with each other. When I showed i will have call you (sic) I printed my written work on newsprint, just like I did with the images, to show beside the video. When I saw it all up on the wall, I was so struck by how text was in the place where one might expect images to be in an exhibition. I think that was an important discovery for me. However, in the film I have made for DI&C, I have focused on the early and final frames from films; with numbers and other odd signs, some of which are unintentional. The film therefore references mathematical equations, which underpin our reality (as we understand life nowadays) and how reality can be codified in that way – just as any simulation is. And so perhaps that’s enough with regards to sign systems and seeing/looking, extensions of human consciousness, for this particular project.

We discussed the David Lynch link and I have linked to the video I watched in the Suggested Reading section. Thank you

We also discussed how death is having more currency and how this could be culturally influenced or significant. The growth of Death Cafes is an example of this. My work is very much about the death and birth of systems, regardless of what system we may be referring to (linguistic, biological, social, political, metaphysical or physical). It should ask people to consider how all systems are born and all systems come to an end, how there is a transitional stage between endings and beginnings, and how we might value those stages. And about how the creation of systems is painful and awkward and violent as deviations must occur. However, the presence of death in society is ‘making a comeback’. And I think that there is something very important about this today. Perhaps something to return to later and make more of? Come to think of it, I have long wanted to create an image of myself lying in a morgue! Facing the fact of one’s death is such a human thing and there is lots to say about this.

Towards the end of your conversation we discussed the echoing of computers on our own brains and I felt that here could be where the work is going. The next stage for you is to write a summation of what the work is about. I plan to after a bit more thinking from me, and some time and has elapsed.

A4: Feedback

20 Jan 201920 May 2019 ~ Sarah-Jane Field ~ 10 Comments

See PDF here: oca field 2dic04 18 jan 19

I have responded in green.

Feedback on assignment

Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Quality of Outcome, Demonstration of Creativity

There are many ideas happening in the various videos on the blog at the moment.
The list of words at the end of the blog post are a good indication of how the work (and your creative mind) is developing. The words have much in common and share a sense of work on the edge.

I should have mentioned where these words come from – I did in the original post but not in the assignment submission which was an error. I took them from Turin’s Chemical Basis of Morphogenesis. It strikes me that in order for life to exist at all we have to have displacement, disturbances, deviations etc. Without those, life cannot form at all – at the genesis of all complex life there is deviation; according to journalist Micheal Marshall in New Scientist, Jan 2012 (The First 3.5 Billion Years) “eukaryotes [the first complex cells] arouse not through competition but by cooperation” (31) and this was a freak event as organisms had not done this before. Had they never found a way to do this, none of us would be here. It is believed, for now, that this divergent behaviour led to all complex, and increasingly complex life thereafter. In Turing’s paper, he describes how divergent behaviour leads to the patterns we see on animal skins for instance. And we know that if the cells which we all begin life with simply kept splitting rather than deviating and disturbing the behaviour which has come before, we would not be anything. I’m not sure where or how this comes into the work yet, but I would like to quote Adam Curtis in a recent interview: “I just think it’s incredibly risky to show stuff early on when you’re trying to combine, say, two or three different narratives together to make a bigger point. It’s so easy to get it wrong. Because you can see it in your brain, but they don’t know your brain.” (2018)

I would undertake some more work on these words, thinking about them, defining them and then seeing what it is that set them apart as well as what they have in common. It could be that it is in the cracks between the words that you find the essence of your project. – see above

There is much on social media this year on having a ‘word of the year’ and the tactics used for people to find their word may be useful to you, to explore these words in a non-academic way. A friend rates Susannah Conway’s Find Your Word very highly. OK but I think it is ‘deviation’

In terms of the videos:
1 The sound is good on this one as it breaks the tension of silence. For me the colour of the wheat against the other half of the frame jars. I could play around with the colour – I guess accepting that the colour of the wheat isn’t true anyway is something to think about, and also about the use of filters and digital techniques to make everything ‘pop’ – taking it to extremes as I did in S&O A5. The found footage of sperm was as is, incidentally. I also like the sound here and another sketch I made later has the same sort of unstructured sound which ends up being so by being slowed down. I watched All That Jazz recently, (Fosse, 1979) and really appreciated the way he used sound – disassociating it from the scene, and will play around that. He lowered the ambient sound and we were taken inside his body as he started having his heart-attack which emerged far more slowly than we might imagine, and that contrasted when the scene broke to the panicky scenes as his family arrives at the hospital. It was powerful.

2 In this video, I wondered on the split of screen – on a small scale the eye struggles with the 2/3 – 1/3 split. This would be different on a larger scale. I am generally thinking about how these films will be shown and assuming they will be projected. I totally agree that much of it tends to struggle on a small screen. I am playing for now and am wondering about showing different fragments on different walls (immersive like A2 which I plan to return to – showing the film as is (more or less) on a wall while footage of the coloured blocks play on another adjacent wall. Perhaps these will switch from time to time further disorientating the viewer.) It is something to keep in mind and perhaps settle on in A6.

3 The shock value of birth dominates over the left hand footage. The use of the audio provides a disconnect which offsets the viewer. There is potential in this play of contrast. See notes about sound and screen split or use of projection space above. I joked that part of me would like to simply show the baby being born and call it After Gustave Courbet. Or else The Origin of Man as Courbet’s work was titled. But I have other ideas too about using the footage on its own, if at all – unless I just put it to one side and title it – as described in point 2.

The use of found footage is an area that gives so many potentials. Assignment 5 gives the opportunity to present a realised finished piece. With assignment 6 there is the potential to rework it even further.

Coursework

Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Demonstration of Creativity

The coursework continues to be well explored. The 10 year olds critique of the memes was interesting on how they perceive this style of visual imagery. There are many ideas coming though in your work and where you have engaged fully with the coursework material, has enabled to produce a very rich tableaux from which to develop your own ideas.

Research

Context, reflective thinking, critical thinking, analysis

You research continues to develop and certain key themes and authors are emerging. Flusser would be one and maybe Irigaray is. Think about who the key influences are and pulling these together these threads in a concise(!) blog post. [I will try!] Are they agreeing with each other or do they have some contradictions? Or it may be that they are all talking along separate divergent lines.

It is really good to see the links to the work from other courses.

Learning Log

Context, reflective thinking, critical thinking, analysis

The discussion from the hangout is well documented and you are reflecting well on the thought of others. With regard to the conversation regarding Digital Gaze – I wonder how the furore regarding the recent Gillette advert plays into this? John and I have a hangout scheduled to discuss this further. I’ll pop that Gillette advert on the list of things to cover.

This area of your blog is forever expanding and is testament to your diligence as a student. You are taking in a wide range of sources and this will only help to further develop your work at Level 3 by having a breadth as well as a depth to your investigations.

Suggested reading/viewing

Context

In response to Regina Dugan (who is possibly the scariest person I have ever heard speak! She’s pretty hardcore!) – there is a Wim Wenders film from the 1990s – Until the End of the World – which focussed on capturing/recording dreams. [Had a great soundtrack if you like that type of music which is why I remember it so well]. I will watch it

Just as I was completing the feedback, I spotted this link to a Bill Viola exhibition at the end of this month. If you have never seen Viola’s work in the flesh it is well worth visiting. There is a Thames and Hudson book on his work which is worth reading as well – “The Art of Bill Viola’.

http://www.rps.org/news/2018/october/bill-viola-michelangelo-exhibition?utm_content=plus- emails.com&utm_source=Royal+Photographic+Society&utm_medium=email&utm_campaig n=January+2019+eRPS Thank you! I look forward to going along

You are probably familiar with the work of Jo Spence, but it may be worth looking at again. Her images lack the contrived sense that Sherman’s now have (I absolutely agree with this). Spence is sometimes picturing herself as what some may view as grotesque (Kristeva’s adjection springs to mind but it is our discomfort with frailty, sickness, the body’s failure to remain ‘ideal’, the knowledge of death) (images from her illness) but not because she was deliberately doing so, but that was how it was. (Thinking about your video with the footage of the birth happening here.) For me there is honest simplicity to her images which is worth contrasting with our now every Instagram ready lifestyles. I agree and perhaps I need to think about contrasting honest simplicity with filtered images as I did when I showed S&OA5 after submitting it.

One last reference source is the Ian McEwan book ‘Nutshell’ – the narrator is an unborn foetus. If you can get past the whole how does it understand and have the language to tell the story, it is an interesting switch on how a story is told and the effect of the other characters decisions have on a life about to begin.

Pointers for the next assignment / assessment

Please inform me of how you would like your feedback for the next assignment: written or video/audio.

Strengths	Areas for development
Strong ideas being developed which show influences of a range of sources	Solidifying the ideas for the final piece
Clear evidence of research and how it is incorporated in to idea development and generation of work.	See if you can comprehend and distil the key sources.
A/V films show further exploration and understanding of how to work with found footage	Work on producing final piece based on feedback and own exploration of various editing methods

A3: Feedback

28 Nov 201820 May 2019 ~ Sarah-Jane Field ~ 4 Comments

Feedback available here: OCA Field 2DIC03 27 Nov 18

This feedback relates to Assignment 3, an essay about digital culture titled Why image-makers should embrace and not fear what the digital revolution has to offer.

Overall Comments (My responses are in orange)

Thanks for the call this morning. We discussed the draft essay and how to approach cutting the word count down.
The essay and postscript plus your reflection come via email. The blog was viewed at:https://sjfdiculture.wordpress.com/category/part-3/

We agreed that a final version of the essay to come with assignment 4. I will be uploading it my blog quite soon, I think so it will be available [Added shortly afterwards – now available here]

For assignment 4, think about casting your ideas wide and then use the review process of assignment 5 (and into assignment 6 if needed) as really refining the idea down into something deep and tangible.

Feedback on assignment

Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Quality of Outcome, Demonstration of Creativity
Key points on essay:

Too long but feels like it could be expanded into longer piece (keep in mind for Level 3)

I was very aware of this but felt I needed some guidance as well as a bit of time away from the essay. After speaking with OCA students and you and two weeks without looking at it, I was much more able to edit. Since the subjects each relate to what I have been looking at over several modules, I do not think writing any of it was a waste of time and may well return to the discarded sections later.

Cut out a strand – refer to it in passing but with comment on limitations of word count. I have done this, in fact, I have cut several strands, some of which I know you liked, plus the archive bit which you recommended, and focused much more on one element – the fluidity of digital technology and what that potentially means for us if we consider it in a similar way to how post-structuralists thought about language and the way it informs our reality (although even then, I felt I was splitting or conflating elements – I can’t quite work it out)

You are using quotes extremely well to move along discussion. However, you can also use them to argue against (or use two or more authors with quotes to create a dialectic). In the version I have edited further, I have tried to do this but suspect there is room for more dialectical positions – I am aware my writing is probably overly polemical for academia, but feel very far removed from that model so it’s really hard for me to get closer to it. In any case, it’s trickier with Azoulay because her arguments are so fresh and no one has argued against them yet, and I think I agree with the underlying thesis so I have tried to counter it with what people have tended to think – I probably should have done so more robustly.

Good clarification on the use of the 1492 date by Azoulay.

Also discussed:
Distinction between film/digital vs. various tools used for writing

We discussed the French Feminists and I’ve included some initial reference sources in the reading section. Lacan will be the starting point here as opposed to Freud.

Consider how some of the earlier pioneers of photography were women (referencing your reference to myopic photography):
Anna Atkins
Madame Yevonde

Julia Margaret Cameron – whose own myopia is credited for her out of focus images I wonder if this will be a good place to begin exploring A4/5/6 – i.e. myopia

Lastly the first person approach is interesting – maybe worth experimenting for assignment 4/5 as a risk. I am not sure I know what you mean with this. I would not expect there to be a problem with first person writing in a practical assignment. I am certainly quite clear that having text in my projects is part of my ‘thing’, voice, style – and I do intend to keep including written work. And, on continuing to be influenced Chris Kraus, so aiming to include personal and theoretical text, along with imagery like I did for S&O

Coursework

Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Demonstration of Creativity

This continues to develop well. Use the remaining exercises/projects to play with material that may already be familiar.

Research

Context, reflective thinking, critical thinking, analysis

Clear research shown throughout. If you don’t do already, do start keeping summary notes of what you are reading/exploring. Brief summaries of useful chapters, key ideas, bullet form that you can understand.

(If I had done this better as a student during my degree my references to you would be much better!)

Learning Log

Context, reflective thinking, critical thinking, analysis

The log continues to develop and be added to. There is a depth of thought and discussion which is showing key engagement with ideas and other students.

A2: Feedback

17 Oct 201820 May 2019 ~ Sarah-Jane Field ~ 2 Comments

Yesterday I spoke with Andrea and discussed the work. The feedback form is available here:

OCA Field 2DIC02 16 Oct 18

Main body below:

Feedback on assignment

Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Quality of Outcome, Demonstration of Creativity

The assignment has taken a very interesting approach and I hope that I have reassured your anxiety that the format and source material is working. Yes, thank you.

We discussed the differences between the two versions and agreed that a final third edit may benefit the final piece, but there should be time delay on this to allow for technical issues to resolve but more importantly some thinking time. I intend to leave this work alone at least until after I have written the essay for A3 and perhaps until I begin preparing for assessment. I have recognised how beneficial returning to work after a delayed period can be. Not only in terms of giving one’s mind and eyes a rest from the technical issues which need ironing out but perhaps more importantly, in terms of significance, making connections, identifying repeating motifs. For instance, when I look at a specific image in S&OA5, I see now that a particular concern of mine is accessing one’s own voice – simply speaking, which is then repeated with the film for DI&CA2. It is only after making the film and seeing the repetition of the sign warning one not to speak, then comparing it with earlier work, that I am able to appreciate just how important this is to me.

Use of cultural references, the blog has plenty of heavyweight academic references which are well utilised but I felt you were lacking some of the cultural references in both presentation and style of the film – Star Trek or early Top of Pops visual effects for example. I shall add this to the context on the assignment page. As a child, my favourite TV programmes and films were indeed science fiction (which my father always dismissed as nonsense), such as Logan’s Run, Star Trek, Man from Atlantis, and Buck Rogers. These programmes play an important part of shaping my view of the world (and everyone else’s, regardless of their opinion about it being rubbish), and it will be useful to investigate this further and apply it to the film I’ve made.

You explained your vision for presentation with several walls being used for an immersive experience into the film. Yes, I have made mock-ups for previous work and would aim to do so for this for assessment demonstrating how I see it presented. I had already begun making another film to play beside it using only the colour blocks, which I took from the warhead film. I envisage three films (or bits of the film) playing on three different walls and alternatively being interrupted by darkness (little sleeps).

We discussed the end of the film and that is something to consider over the next few weeks on how you can end it rather than it just stopping. I was surprised when I re-watched the film to see it end so abruptly. I must go back in and look at what I’ve done to make it like this. When I revisit this, I will tidy it up, find a way to resolve it more fluently.

Coursework

Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Demonstration of Creativity

The coursework is being extremely well considered. There is a depth to your reading and connections in understanding between various sources. There was good synthesis between Derrida and McLuhan in Exercises 2.2.

The bullet point style jottings are showing a mind at work and we discussed the difference between the writing brain and the editing brain. This short blog post introduces the topic – and the writing coach Daphne Grey-Grant who writes much more about this:

https://medium.com/@jenwain/daphne-grey-grant-first-introduced-me-to-this-concept-and-i-can-honestly-say-it-s-radically-changed-eb2e1cc259d4

Thank you

Research

Context, reflective thinking, critical thinking, analysis

Research is a clear strength in your work and you are making connections as well as drilling down into topics. We discussed how to start logging ideas/research etc going forward. This is in consideration of Level 3 and beyond.

Look into Evernote and other similar applications. Assignment 4/5/6 on this course will allow for a much bigger and longer term project than any previous assignment. This will give you an ideal opportunity to try out how you can organise all your related notes, images, ideas, research sources etc. Will do, it will be so helpful to find a way to control everything. I have found it helpful to look back over old notes/blogs and be reminded of things I’ve written down before.

Learning Log

Context, reflective thinking, critical thinking, analysis

The log is well developed and you are actively engaging with other students which is feeding creatively into your work (and I presume into theirs).

There is a clear sense of your own writing voice emerging. This is echoed in your work where it is becoming clear that there is a single voice of you as creator. Good!

We didn’t discuss this, but I would recommend setting regular review points in where you check in with your progress. I wouldn’t link these to set points in the course eg end of an assignment but much more on a calendar schedule. This sounds useful.

Sounds a bit corny but a scheduled meeting with yourself where you review your work, question progress and make plans and decisions on where to take things. As you work on bigger projects, things can start to meander a bit. These review points can help you pull yourself back on track.

Suggested reading/viewing

Context

Rather than reading more, I’ve suggested research how to organise your work in general. Keeping track of projects outside of a college environment is a challenge for any creative. A good plan pus I do keep plugging away at small sections of Derrida and I have now ordered Archive Fever which I’d mentioned was not available for sale a few weeks ago.

My research is to watch the Tim Hetherington film – it’s good for us tutors to have targets as well! It is worth it. An excellent film – although deeply upsetting. It made me think about Oh What a Lovely War and First World War poetry.

You outlined your ideas and thinking for assignment 3. Do let me know if you want to send a rough draft nearer the time. I will certainly do this.

As you are focussing down potentially on one aspect, do just outline that with either a sub heading for a title or in the opening paragraph. Already done (in draft form)

Pointers for the next assignment / assessment

Please inform me of how you would like your feedback for the next assignment: written or video/audio.

Strengths	Areas for development
Taking risks and making work that looks like mine, i.e. not predictable.	There are further risks I can take but I must be careful and considered about this.
Working with concepts that are tricky	I would like to take the time and dig down further, really understand the concepts I’m exploring on a deeper level. I think sometimes, I am quick to comprehend things superficially but because of that don’t always digest as much as I should, which would make my understanding far richer. And without a deeper understanding, I can struggle to express what I mean as well as I might.
My DI&C blog is probably the strongest in terms of organisation yet. (It’s vastly improved from my first effort in TAOP)	Storing my work is a nightmare! This links to the organisational apps but it’s more than that. I really need to find a system across all elements of my work that is efficient and easy to use – for me as much as anyone else.

Tutor name	Andrea Norrington
Date	16^th October 2018
Next assignment due	23^th November 2018 (I’m making this tight as have completed the exercises and am working on the essay already – but I do need some time to read up further on concepts I don’t have enough of a grasp on).

A1: Feedback

13 Aug 201820 May 2019 ~ Sarah-Jane Field ~ 3 Comments

Full feedback document for A1 can be found in the linked PDF below. My comments are included in the document in orange. Below I have copied the main body. This is a summary of the conversation Andrea and I had this morning.

Feedback – A1 Field

Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Quality of Outcome, Demonstration of Creativity

The assignment has evolved from a more obvious approach to using audio visual format. While this work may not be fully realised I recommended to move on rather than rework. (It may be that you come back to this for assignment 4/5). I was very pleased to hear this. I have always felt more inclined to work this way although have reworked in the past when recommended to, and I’ve been pleased to do so as I discovered new avenues. But I do need to get this degree done and move on to an MA. Since I am working under my own steam I think moving on and seeing where I can go rather than revisiting at this stage is probably the most advantageous way of working. Picking up the work if that seems the right thing to do later is my preferred option.

The use of audio visual is showing promise – there are many ideas happening. Use this course to play around, take risks and explore as much as you can in preparation for Level 3. Again, glad to have this encouragement.

We spoke about viewing as much AV work as possible. I need to write up a few more gallery visits and yes, they often include or are mainly focused on AV work.

Create a running log on pieces that work and ones that don’t. OK! There is no recipe as such for creating but it may be that you can gauge what works for you. AV is often substantially more time consuming so do factor that in as you progress through the course.

The two videos I mentioned were shown at The Art of Terror at the Imperial War Museum:

Shona Illingworth – 216 Westbound – I have found excerpts online.

Khaled Abdulwahed – Tuj – https://vimeo.com/61097242

In both of these the use of the audio is carefully controlled to elicit a response from the viewer.

Coursework

Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Demonstration of Creativity

Coursework exercises are being completed. You are showing a clear involvement with the sources of work. The use of Instagram posts works well – and gets an involvement from another audience/platform.

Do you include the comments made on any work? Do you mean the comments made by others? I think the way the link embeds does not show these automatically but they are easily accessed by clicking through to IG. Where people have said something particularly useful I may copy and paste into a reflection and will keep this in mind in future.

Research

Context, reflective thinking, critical thinking, analysis

There is clear evidence of continued and detailed research underpinning all the work presented. I didn’t say this on the call but the next stage is to start to link/synthesise themes through your work. I think I was aware of this and will endeavour to link more going forward.

I mentioned about having a brief summary of the sources that you have used – this can help to refer to back sources. Good idea. It’s very hard to recall where I’ve read things

As you approach Level 3, synthesis of ideas is going to become more paramount and push critical thinking further.

I spoke about using pop culture references – which you have referenced in previous courses. Will do. I am very interested in referencing popular culture and combining it with the heavy thinkers – giving each equal weight.

Learning Log

Context,reflective thinking, critical thinking, analysis

The log is easy to navigate. It is clear that you are becoming confident in your own style. The piece on Tacita Dean combined with your own family story is very interesting. I am glad you have said this. I would not normally write about a gallery visit in this way but it felt worth trying in this instance. Looking back over all I’ve read in the last few years I think this type of writing is a direct influence from author Chris Kraus who combines critical theory with real life and fiction. She is highly critical of the art world’s closed and exclusive habits. I have also long been interested in a writing style that embraces subjectivity. I discuss this on my UVC blog here https://uvcsjf.wordpress.com/2016/12/05/a5-research-writing-style-language-denial-of-self-emotion-feeling/ How you switch between the passages, there is more to be made of the gaps between the transitions – reference Derrida here. I plan to delve into Derrida more. I agree, he probably has much to add.

Suggested reading/viewing

Context

I suggested that you follow up on:

The Photograph: A Strange, Confined Space – Mary Price

This books follows on from ideas from Sontag, Barthes et al. See what you think?

Watch some Win Wenders – Alice in the Cities or Wings of Desire. See how he uses space in the visual alongside the audio. Alice in the Cities is the film which he credits with developing the style that he would make his own. I look forward to watching these despite the recent phone-camera comments!

Follow up on the Derrida – there is more to be made about slippage and the margins.

I didn’t say this on the call, but also think about the use of tropes/motifs in your work. The Ongoing Moment by Geoff Dyer is great for thinking along these lines, if you haven’t read it. I’ve read this (and note his writing style was also interesting and probably quite influential)

Pointers for the next assignment / assessment

Please inform me of how you would like your feedback for the next assignment: written or video/audio. I don’t mind either way but I do like speaking with tutors.

Strengths	Areas for development
Beginning to feel ok about taking risks and not worrying about what other people think (a significant issue for me in the past)	Take further, bigger risks
Work is embedded in critical questions – it’s about something. I’m not just taking pretty pictures (far from it!)	Clarity of thought is always an issue – my head feels muddy and so putting things in an orderly fashion is challenging
Confident with still images techniques	But need to develop moving image and audio skills further

Strengths		Areas for development
Mature use of quotations to expand essay discussion, move topics along.	Don’t be afraid of using quotations to disagree with them.
Deepening and expanded knowledge	Still not making sure I am fully immersed in the theory before making assumptions which are later proven wrong
Love thinking about and exploring ideas mentally	But really need to start applying the ideas to practical work (although the way the course is structured makes this an easy trap to fall into)